How Therapy Can Help with The Coming-Out Process
There’s no one right way to come out. The process is different for everyone based on many factors. Talking to a therapist can help when preparing to come out to your family, friends, and those closest to you.
What Does it Mean to Come Out?
The easiest and possibly best way to explain this is that you’re letting others in your life know something that you already know about yourself. This could be your sexual orientation, which includes emotional, physical, romantic, or sexual attraction. It could include having an attraction to men, women, or someone who is non-binary.
In other cases, it could include behavior or identity, including how you see yourself. It can also explain your gender identity.
Preparing for the Conversation
One of the first stages of coming out is to have self-recognition and exploration of your sexual orientation. It’s important to understand and explore how you’re feeling. This can include a variety of emotions, including denial, anger, curiosity, excitement, and fear.
How Therapy Can Help
When deciding to talk to a therapist, working with someone who makes you feel safe and supported is important. Throughout this process, your therapist will help you explore your identity and the impacts, both negative and positive, of coming out to those around you. A therapist will be able to provide support and help with multiple areas including:
Sharing your story with others
Since there is no one-size-fits-all approach or perfect way to approach the coming-out process, speaking to a therapist can be invaluable. Talking to a qualified and unbiased professional can be a great resource and test to help prepare you to talk to those closest to you.
Help set expectations
They can help you realize that you don’t have to live up to others’ expectations. In some cases, this can be the most difficult part. Sometimes, it’s possible to feel like you’re failing to live up to those expectations set by people in your life. Those people can include members of your family, church, or community.
You may feel like you know how those around you will react, both positively and negatively. By talking to a therapist, they can help you work through the expectations and how to respond. It can also be a way to help you cope with negative interactions.
Provide a safe space to talk
Sometimes it’s hard to know when and where to have this conversation. If you have family members, friends, or other loved ones who are struggling with your process of coming out, consider having a joint session with a therapist. A counseling session between you, a therapist, and that person in your life can be an invaluable resource to help everyone work through this new reality. It can be a time and place where everyone can speak freely without judgment or concern while having someone who can mediate and help lead the conversation.
Avoid feeling shame
Unfortunately, many people going through the coming-out process internalize their feelings and feel shame. This can occur whether they feel like their family and friends will be supportive or not. It’s important to realize that there’s no shame in living your truth and sharing your truth with others. Working with a therapist can help pinpoint areas of shame in your life and dismantle their power.
Find community
Everyone changes and evolves, and that can include integrating new identities. As you explore the new doors that open from coming out, finding a community can be exhilarating and intimidating. A therapist can help you navigate those waters and offer you resources.
Are you interested in meeting with a therapist at Essential Insights Counseling Center to begin your coming-out process? Call us at 781-693-3200 or schedule your free phone consultation online today!